


yeah, you're my medicine

by post_acidx



Category: The 1975 (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Anxiety, Best Friends, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:40:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23332522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/post_acidx/pseuds/post_acidx
Summary: Matty and George had been friends forever, but slowly things start changing for them. they have a hard time dealing with it, until Matty finds the perfect way to express his feelings.
Relationships: George Daniel/Matthew Healy
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17
Collections: Song Based FanFiction





	1. one

Loud music. People scream-talking over the music. A bar displaying as many bottles of liquor as you could imagine. Hot girls grinding on each other in the middle of the room. And still Matty was in a bad mood. He loved parties as much as he loved gorgeous girls almost kissing while dancing to some provocative tune. But never in his life he wanted so bad to get out of a place. Matty was pissed drunk and the hottest girl at the party, the one he has been chasing for the past month or so, had just turned him down. He knew right from the start that hooking up with Gemma wouldn’t be easy, but he trusted his abilities more than anything in the world. Which is why whenever they failed him, he would feel miserable. Of course, he was upset that the girl he desperately wanted to fuck didn’t want him back, but he was much more bothered by the fact that he couldn’t pull this off. He never had problems with girls before, his sweet talk and ‘bad boy’ pose would always get him where he wanted, even if it took a few weeks. But Gemma had just dismissed him for life, like, I never want to see your face ever again and the boy sitting with a half empty cup of beer in his hand couldn’t comprehend. Maybe he had dated a friend of hers and broke her heart, maybe she had a secret boyfriend, or maybe she was just sick of Matty’s shit, like everyone else.

Matty had a lot of friends, it’s not like he was the worst person in the world. In fact, his company was always requested at parties, due to his ability to make almost everything he spoke about sound incredibly interesting. But in the long run people didn’t really want to stay. Girlfriends that didn’t last even a month, close friends that always ended up arguing with him and never coming back. Matty could be a difficult person sometimes, he could admit it, with his strong opinions and lack of a filter when it came to express them. He also liked to be the centre of things, a lot. So, going out with him could feel a little tiring sometimes, when all you feel like is seeing your friends and suddenly your boyfriend is surrounded by people while he monologues about plastic waste or something. Matty was also moody, meaning that whenever he wasn’t feeling like, people had to keep their distance or he would fire at them sarcastic comments of all types. He knew he could be a bit difficult sometimes, but he also didn’t think he was unlovable. He had great friends that had been by his side since forever and they have learned how to deal with all the mood swings and the egocentrism he was so very aware of. They got along so well they had a band together, and it was doing just fine thank you very much. So, deep down, Matty knew that wasn’t the problem, but that thought didn’t come to light this night.

He decided to down as many shots as it was humanly possible so his weird thoughts and massive fail wouldn’t have the opportunity to bring him down. His best mates were nowhere in sight and he thanked for that, any of them would have snatched all those drinks from his hand and brought some sense to his little overthinking head. Matty didn’t want to be brought to his senses, he wanted to lose them all. There was something about being heavily intoxicated that marvelled him since he was a kid. Being able to disconnect from all things, even your body, for a while fascinated him. Brought him the feeling of being weightless and out of worries. There was a lot in his head. All the time. And sometimes, when it became unbearable, he would turn to alcohol or drugs. He knew that that wasn’t the best thing to do, and he always worked on that, but tonight things got out of his grip. His friends and family would always bring him light in these moments and offer different alternatives for all of the noise his head was making. They tried hard and Matty often refrained from self-destructing because he could see how much they cared and how far they would go to keep him safe, because honestly all the alternatives they proposed were kinda shit. 

But there was one person who always knew how to ease him. It was amazing how many times George had said the right thing at the right time and Matty couldn’t be any more thankful. Countless times George took him out of uncomfortable situations, helped with his insomnia, played video games with him until he was satisfied that he had learned it all, made the right beat to the lyrics wandering around his head, and just in general made Matty’s life easier. So, that’s why when all of the other thoughts had escaped Matty’s drunken mind, George was the only one left there. He was playing with his curls sitting on a chair outside because he felt way too much like throwing up and the only thing that crossed his mind was his best friend’s disapproving face. Where was he by the way, Matty wondered. They had been apart for too long and that’s not common. They’re always together, almost in an annoying way, because wherever he looked there was a tall blonde shadow hovering over him. He probably had managed to slip under some girl’s skirt earlier and it’s too busy with that right now. Thinking about that made Matty’s stomach turn even more. Ugh, he already regretted having that many drinks. He never liked to imagine his best friend with someone else, gave him goose bumps even. Somehow, he didn’t like to share him with anybody. He didn’t want George to know somebody else’s favourite radio show or how many moles were there in this girl’s back, all of these were reserved to Matty. He could share George with Adam and Ross, it wasn’t the same. They had a good relationship in a common way, they knew each other really well, but they weren’t complementary. You see, Adam could get through his day very well if he didn’t see George or Matty, even if they didn’t even exchange a text message, the next day they would still talk as if nothing had happened and they aren’t less friends because of that. But the days Matty didn’t see George just felt incomplete. Like he had forgotten to put his underwear in the morning and had to walk around the whole day with this uneasy feeling of jeans scratching his bum. That’s why they moved in together the day Matty turned 18 and decided they would dedicate themselves 100% to their music. So, whenever George didn’t come home from a night out and Matty had to leave the house without his good morning nod and loud cereal crunches that came from where his mate would sit, he would feel extremely annoyed. 

Like he was feeling right now, after he got rejected and his best mate had apparently vanished from this two-story house. Matty just wanted to get up and leave but he felt like he couldn’t. He was too dizzy and all out of strength. Shit, he would need help, and this is the last thing he wanted right now. He just wanted to blink and be magically placed on his bed. But this wasn’t going to happen anytime soon, so he stumbled out of the chair he was sitting on and balanced himself on the garden table placed in front of him. He closed his eyes and took deep breaths trying to balance himself. But he couldn’t finish three steps before he felt someone strongly holding his arm.

“You alright there, mate?” His best friend looked down at him with a stupid grin plastered all over his face. As much as George didn’t like seeing Matty that drunk, he knew that was the first time in months this had come to happen, and he was proud of Matty for how long he has gone without losing control. And he also liked seeing the dark-haired boy move like a baby giraffe giving its first steps from the kitchen window where he was standing by not even a minute ago.

“I’m fine.” Matty slurred and tried to pull his arm from George’s grip. He didn’t want help, he didn’t need help. The taller boy just tightened his grip and rolled his eyes, used to his best friend always being so stubborn. 

“Let’s get you home shall we.” Before Matty could open his mouth to say that he would go home alone and didn’t need George to babysit him, he continued. “The party is dying anyway.” 

It was a blatant lie and they both knew, people were still having a blast and it wasn’t even 2 AM. George still wanted to sweet talk a girl into a room, but he would have to leave that for later. Matty wasn’t that drunk that he couldn’t notice that George was just avoiding Matty’s stubbornness, but he wouldn’t say anything either because he desperately needed his house. Their house. The safest place he could think of right now, with all of their stuff scattered all over the place. The drunk boy sighed in relief and as George called a cab home, he noticed how relaxed he had become. He felt so good whenever he saw his best friend relax a bit from all of his thousands of thoughts, when Matty’s expression finally became blank and he didn’t have the smartest comment to make. He liked seeing Matty go off about anything, with all his knowledge and passion about great discussions, but that’s something everybody got to see, the people at parties, the interviewers. But the quiet, relaxed Matty was all his, he knew no one else had figured him out as well as he did, so around them he would pull on his curls to mask his anxiety and pretend that playing Monopoly really was the best option they had. 

When the cab arrived, George helped Matty in, and as they were heading home, he felt his chest warm when dark curls approached his chin and he felt his friend resting his head on his broad shoulders. He awkwardly embraced him because he felt the need to. The taller didn’t know why but he had been feeling the need to do a lot of things to the small framed boy that was probably drooling on his favourite button up. His heart tightened at the thought that maybe he would feel the need to tell Matty how he really felt, because he had a strong intuition that he didn’t feel the same. He never knew someone that would have so many girls in a single week, so it’s not like he would be okay with the idea of sharing an intimate moment with a massive dude like him. George didn’t even know when he started to realize what type of feelings he really had for Matty, but since then he has been very good at digging them real deep. But something switched a few weeks ago and he’s not being able to hold it in as much. He knows that he can’t tell, but he doesn’t know how longer he will manage to hide that. Earlier today, when Matty showed up in the living room with his floral button shirt, only closed at the two bottom buttons, George felt very vulnerable and almost ruined everything. Matty had chosen this shirt to record a music video with and it was the best choice he could have made because he looked so damn heavenly in it. So, whenever he took a glance over his friend, the need to embrace him was so overwhelming that he stepped away. He disappeared mid-party and left Matty alone to his girls business, and George sought help with Adam and Ross. They knew it all, they knew it even before George said anything, and they were both sure Matty felt the same. But George just couldn’t risk it. 

When they arrived home, George had such a hassle to drag him upstairs. Matty refused to wake up from his nap so he had to push him up the stairs to their apartment, and when he got there, he refused to take a shower too. George didn’t care and shoved him under cold water and fed him sugar until he felt he had come down to his senses. Matty was so annoyed now, and sported the biggest frown cause he was cold and kept blabbering how that wasn’t necessary at all. George knew he was all better as soon as he started complaining and stomped his way to his room. He walked behind him and stood at his door to make sure he was getting to bed.

“… now I’ll probably get a cold and drink gallons of nasty tea, so my voice doesn’t crack on that stupid rehearsal we scheduled at Hann’s house at Monday morning. For fuck sake, who schedules things for Monday morning when we literally have six other days…”

“Shut up, go to bed.” He simply stated with a stupid smile as he sometimes enjoyed his friend’s grumpiness. “Good night, Matty.” He was turning around to leave when he heard Matty call him in an uneasy tone.

“Wait, G… Could you, like, maybe, stay.” He blurted out looking straight into George’s eyes. 

“Ummm, yeah…” George wasn’t sure what to do or where that had come from, so he just walked unsurely into room and closed the door. “Mind if I turn off the lights?”

“No, no, go ahead.” The smaller one stated trying to sound as uninterested as possible. George turned off the lights and undressed to go to bed. They had seen each other in their underwear so many times, hell even naked, but this time felt different and he could feel his cheeks burn and his heart race. The air in the room was tense when he lifted the covers to lie next to Matty and he knew he could feel it too. He tried to keep a distance from his friend under the covers so things weren’t even weirder but Matty quickly asked.

“Why are you so far away from me, I’m not gonna bite you” George scooted over until he could feel Matty’s cold arm slightly brush on his. They stood completely still for a moment, and he felt Matty shuffling around the bed to get comfortable to sleep, he did this every time, George knew. He shuffled closer and rested his head full of great smelling curls at the base of his neck and the blonde’s heartbeats fastened. “Good night G.”

“Night Matty.” He whispered softly on the top of his head, he could still feel the smell of alcohol coming from his friend and he felt slightly guilty for not being around him tonight so when the need to embrace him struck again, he couldn’t help but to lace his arm around his fragile shoulders. 

“You’re my medicine.” Matty lazily mumbled and got George confused, was he dreaming? Or maybe hallucinating.

“What?” 

“Yeah, you’re medicine.” Matty fell deadly silent after that, and his breathing stilled showing George that he was asleep, leaving him alone with the torrent of thoughts that invaded his head at that moment. Tiredness eventually beat George’s nervousness and he finally got to sleep with more questions in his head that he has ever had before.


	2. two

The day after the party Matty and George woke up really hungover and it was a quiet day on the second-floor apartment next to the Italian restaurant. Very few words were exchanged between the two, and deep down they knew they had been avoiding an important topic. At around 8 PM, Matty locked himself in his room, probably to write something and George couldn’t stop the hurricane of thoughts going around his head. Why was Matty acting so weird all of a sudden, how would he hold back all of the feelings that had seemed to only become stronger day by day and when would he be able to cuddle Matty to sleep again, were some of the things bothering the tall boy. He decided on taking a shower and going to bed early after popping a sleeping pill, because after all they had the rehearsal early next morning. He did things slowly with a stupid hope that Matty would open the door and they would talk nonsense until dawn as they used to, but at 10, when he was finally ready to go to bed, the curly haired boy was still trapped in his own world. George got closer to the closed door and could hear a faint mumble and the guitar softly playing in the background, so he figured it was better to leave his friend alone. He just said his goodnight to the wooden piece between them and didn’t even hear an answer. Matty was probably pissed because George treated him like a little girl last night and he felt bad. He hated when they fought and would do literally anything at his reach to avoid that. Sometimes George lost his cool, don’t get him wrong, like when Matty broke his skateboard when they were 15 and tried to blame his little brother, Louis was only 2 for goodness sake. George was more bothered by his friend’s lie than by the broken skateboard, but that was what Matty did sometimes. He was too proud to admit being wrong or being weak, that’s why he knew confessing for him would be so hard. George could see it already, Matty ignoring him and pretending that he was just out of his mind for even considering stuff like that. The blonde one would argue and try to explain that those feelings were indeed real, and the dark-haired would just keep brushing it off. And at some point, they would lose patience with one another and that was it, their whole life of friendship would go down the drain never to come back. Because George wouldn’t be able to continue to pretend nothing was going on, and God knows how much time would take Matty to admit that his best friend was in love with him. And George wasn’t even considering how much would hurt to be rejected by him, oh my. He would certainly go to bed early every night and torture himself till dawn with thoughts of Matty and his thousand girls. 

George probably fell asleep at 3AM. Not even the sleeping pill could help the poor boy. He would show up at rehearsal looking trash and the boys would immediately know that something was up, but there was nothing he could do now. When he looked at his reflection in the mirror the next morning he grimaced. His hair was all over the place, he had bags under his eyes and he looked miserable. George was never the one to care about his appearance that much, unlike Matty, that spent literally one hour just on his hair. So, he just tucked his messy hair under the hood of his sweatshirt and put on his favourite jeans and headed out to eat his cereal. He could hear Matty singing in the shower, so he was probably in a better mood today, which cheered him up a little. When he stopped hearing the sound of water coming from the bathroom, he knew Matty would come out at any second and for some reason he felt really nervous about it. His stomach twisted and his cereal suddenly turned very unappealing, the smell of milk making him sick. George didn’t know how he’d live if he felt so nervous every time his friend was about to enter a room, and he would eventually have to deal with that. Maybe he was just afraid Matty was going to bring up the party day incident, when they both shared a bed and George was acting all touchy around him. He was sure that didn’t go unnoticed, but he wasn’t so sure on why was the blunt straight forward curly haired ignoring it. As much as the blonde wanted all of this to be forgotten, he wanted them to settle things once and for all. When the bathroom door opened, he could smell Matty all over the place, the fancy shampoo, the soft conditioner and, of course, the obnoxious perfume he wore every time he had to go out. See, Matty would smell very mildly at home, a scent that could even resemble lavender and its calming properties. But whenever he had any event to attend, he’d wear the strong, masculine perfume to help expand his figure and draw even more attention than the wild hair and bold choices of clothing. That was another thing George liked to keep to himself, his natural scent, and how at ease he would feel whenever he smelled that in the morning. He heard the bathroom door close and Matty walk in the hallway still humming the tune he sang in the shower, and just a second later he heard his friend’s door close too. George took a deep breath and calmed himself a bit, seeing that he had bought himself more time. He stood up and threw the rest of the cereal away, knowing all too well that he couldn’t finish it.   
For some reason George thought that the best option he had was to avoid Matty this morning, at least until he had figured some things out in his head. So, right after he entered his room to get ready, George rushed into the bathroom to brush his teeth and hurriedly put his sneakers on by the door, even though he was very aware that it would take Matty at least half an hour to leave his room ready. He knew that if he went up to his friend’s door, he would make him wait and go to Hann’s with him, share a cab maybe, since Matty would be late. So, he knew it was better to leave without saying goodbye, even if that left him with an uneasy feeling. He would take a long, quiet walk to rehearsal and he could text him along the way.

Matty was messing up his curls when his phone lit up with a short weird text: “Off to Hann’s. Had to buy cigarettes, see ya there.” He somehow felt awkward and all of the confidence he woke up with today simply vanished. George wouldn’t left without him, especially without saying goodbye, something was off. This made the skinny boy anxious. After the party he was almost certain that George wanted to be with him as much as he did but looking at it now it seemed like he was avoiding Matty. And maybe, singing that song in rehearsal today wasn’t a good idea after all. It took him too long to pick a shirt, and before he noticed he was late, as usual. He quickly called a cab and rushed to the suburban neighbourhood Adam lived at, very distinct from where he and George lived. Their neighbourhood was exactly like where you’d expect an upcoming artist would live; the cheapest place next to the city and urban life, a crappy building with small apartments that cost way more than it should. He remembered the day that they chose their place like it was yesterday, both so eager to live in the city that they were willing to sacrifice comfort. That was precisely why they have been getting closer day by day, they share such a small space together that at this point it’s inevitable that they are becoming one. His thoughts were interrupted when the cab driver called him stating that they had arrived. Matty easiness, brought by the happy thoughts he was having, quickly vanished. His hands were suddenly sweaty when he went to the door he was so used to seeing. He was so out of it that he knocked, instead of heading straight in, so when he came to himself and opened the door, the three boys were sitting there looking very confused.

“Good morning lads.” He tried to act normal and see if they would drop it, but of course Ross had a commentary to make while the curly haired boy walked in avoiding eye contact.

“Oh my, first George comes in without his conjoined twin, then you get here and knock?! Water in your house must be tampered.” He and Adam giggled, but George looked as uncomfortable as Matty, so he was the first to say.

“Let’s start then.” He awkwardly clapped and headed to the garage where their rehearsals took place. All of the boys followed suit, all terribly quiet due to the tension very much perceivable in the air. They took their time getting ready in their positions and, as always, Matty started a song so the boys would follow. They were four songs in when Adam suddenly stopped playing and yelled over the other instruments.

“That’s it.” The music playing came to a halt and Matty furrowed his brows in his direction. “This sounds awful, am I the only one hearing it?”

“No mate, this indeed sounds like pure shit.” Ross agreed. “You’re both off. Matty’s gotten all the lyrics wrong and George looks like is still asleep.”

“Hey! It’s not that bad you dingus!” As expected Matty protested, since he wasn’t a big fan of criticism.

“It’s terrible! What’s going on with you two?” Ross inquired loudly. 

“I’m sorry, I just had a bad night of sleep.” George spoke up with his raspy voice and sighed. “I’ll drink a cup of coffee or something.”

“No, clearly something else is wrong. I’ve seen you play amazingly running on two-hour-sleep and toffee after a wild party. You’re both somewhere else right now and we need to know where so we can bring you back.” Adam said taking his electric guitar strap off his shoulder, and this meant they wouldn’t play shit until he felt like things were figured out. 

“Shit… Alright, alright. Let’s settle things then.” Matty said seeming annoyed by all of this and laid down his electric guitar too, he hated wasting time. “But first, you’ll have to shut up and listen to a song I wrote yesterday okay. No questions.” He used his ‘we’re doing what I want’ tone and everyone sighed knowing that this was how things were going to go. The boys sat on the garage floor while Matty picked up his guitar. “Okay, here goes nothing.” 

He exhaled, closed his eyes and started playing. A sweet melody started to fill the room and all the tension that was there was soon gone. It was a calm, beautiful intro and it seemed to magically ease everyone’s mood. 

“I find it hard to say bye-bye  
Even in the state of you and I  
And how can I refuse?  
Yeah you rid me of the blues  
Ever since you came into my life” 

Matty’s voice came out a bit shaky at first, but he was gaining confidence as he kept going and the boys just quietly watched as another piece of art took form in front of them.

“Because you're my medicine  
(Yeah, you're medicine)  
Yeah, you're my medicine  
(Yeah, you're medicine)  
(Yeah, you're medicine)” 

As soon as the word ‘medicine’ left Matty’s lips George’s heart started to beat wildly fast in his warm chest, this couldn’t be a coincidence. But this also couldn’t be what he was thinking, he felt so confused he thought he could die right there, a love song being the cause of it. George’s head was spinning by now and nothing seemed to make sense anymore, but all doubts left his mind when Matty looked him in the eyes and sang the next verse.

“I, I wanna marry you  
Said, "I, I adore you"  
And that's all I have to say, "bye-bye"  
And you opiate this hazy head of mine”

He froze in place and felt the weight of the world being lifted off his shoulders. So, he really was this lucky, the guy he loved apparently loved him back. Matty sang the chorus again but at this point George couldn’t focus in anything else other than embracing the smaller one and never letting go. As soon as he was finished, Adam and Ross gave stupid excuses and hurriedly left the room. George got up on his feet and looked into Matty’s eyes and what he saw was a bit unusual. He looked vulnerable, and thus, scared. The blonde one knew the feeling well, since he has been struggling with it for a while now. The distance between them was getting smaller with each step George took in his best friend direction. He saw it clearly when Matty licked his lips, in a failed attempt to make his mouth less dry, before asking.

“So, do you like the song?” He asked quick and bluntly, as he did whenever he got nervous.

“Yeah, it’s a very good one.” The distance between them was practically none, and George’s stomach was touching the guitar between them whenever he took deep breaths. 

“What’s it about?” As soon as the question left his lips he giggled, knowing exactly what the boy in front of him would say.

“Oh, come on!” He rolled his eyes. “Don’t make this any cornier than it already is.” He said in an annoyed tone looking in George’s eyes again. The taller one couldn’t wait anymore and softly grabbed Matty’s face in his big hands. He opened his mouth but no words came to it, so he just closed it again and leaned forward. Matty stood completely still, his brown eyes glistening. After what felt like an eternity, George finally closed the distance between them and touched his soft lips. They felt ecstatic, not believing that this was happening after all. All this years of friendship, shared secrets at midnight, car rides around town, cigarettes smoked, clothes scattered at the apartment floor, and their lives were now officially merging. There were no words to describe how insanely intense this kiss was starting to become, after Matty got rid of the only thing in between them at that moment, the guitar. They held each other so close it got harder to breath, having their tongues intertwined wasn’t helping either. Even if they didn’t want, they felt like the kiss had to be stopped. With foreheads glued and erratic breaths meeting, they looked at each other again, and all they could see was pure happiness in both of their expressions. So, this was it, at last they had all they ever needed, the best medicine for getting through life, love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, that was it! hope you all liked it, and I know Matty already told what the real meaning of Medicine is, but I can't help to think about this when I hear it hahaha thanks for reading and commenting!


End file.
